I feel so sad that I am not spending as much time here as I used to, nor do I spend enough time with all my blogger friends I've followed for years. Never doubt that I carry you all in my mind. Sacred Ordinary was originally created in Nov. 2004 as part of my daily writing practice--and I was fairly faithful until about a year ago. Facebook had something to do with it, but impermanence, too. Nothing stays the same.
But today I want to share a SoulCollage® card I made yesterday I call Fran's Missing Man.
I've had this image in my scrapbox for so long and it called out to be made tangible. I put this in the Committee suit as the missing man is a motif in my persona. I am the one who was married for 27 years and have been divorced for 25 years. My life's goal was to be a wife and mother and being a mother is my life's work I am most proud of, I'll admit. But, I also like having a man in my life. I am the one who did date after my divorce until 1996 and when that last relationship ended I knew it was time to make some big changes. I made a contract with a priest friend to stop dating for at least two years as it is my nature to adapt to whatever man I'm with and forget who I am. Sixteen years have passed and a compelling companion/male friend never manifested again and I am not willing to do the things you have to do to put yourself out there to make that happen. There is a missing piece in me because of that and the yearned-for man remains a puzzle, a man without a face. They say you get set in your ways when you live alone and that's me for sure. But, I am so very grateful to my family, friends, my paid and volunteer colleagues. My life is very full though it is without a specific significant other male. But, I always thought I would remarry and that hasn't happened. Because I am able to support myself financially without help from a man, I guess I just haven't found the oomph to compromise to make space for someone else. I am, however, extremely grateful for the wonderful life I have.
Does this make sense to any of you?