Mi Amaria
Wisdom guide, muse, cornerstone,
Who sees so clearly.
This SoulCollage® card in the Council suit depicts my more than 30-year wisdom guide who often journeys with me when I journal. Amaria first came to me in the early 1980s as I wrote next to a creek at a favorite place of mine, La Casa de Maria in Montecito. She told me her name and she has been with me ever since.
I have made several images of her in SoulCollage® and art, but none ever really depicted her as I saw her in my mind’s eye. By the creek she came to me in what appeared to be coarse, brown monk’s robe with her face only partially exposed. In the National Intensive Journal work of Ira Progoff,which I’ve used since the mid-1970s and that I taught for many years, there is a section called Inner Wisdom Dialogue.
That’s usually where I would turn when life was rocky and I had big decisions to make. Her divine feminine voice is strong and gentle, low and a bit husky. She was a crucial companion when my marriage came unraveled and ended. She was a rock during both my breast cancer treatments. She often visited when my grandkids lived with me in high school. She has never been a form of God to me, just someone to bring me strength, a pilgrim with me on the journey. By making SoulCollage® cards for her, she draws out feelings I don’t even know I’m hiding. She becomes even more tangible than when she speaks to me in the journal. She is a clarifier.
In the language of SoulCollage®, I am the one who often feels alone, a kind of orphan. I am fearful and tend to hide in the ruts of routine. I am the child-like one who needs a mystical mother, a loving sister, an affirmer of my femininity. I am the one who is often reminded by Amaria that it’s safe sometimes to be alone. She puts her steadying hand on my back and sometimes even holds my hand, ever reminding me that I just feel alone, but I never am. I am the one who is reminded by her to start each day with intention and to look for the sacred in the ordinary. “Amaria,” I say to her, “I am the one who will carve out time this weekend to spend with you—not for comfort so much, but to say thank you for giving me such blessed support which I've largely taken for granted. You are pure gift."
A question I could pose to her? Not a question exactly, but certainly a request at another of life's intersections. "Amaria, please remind me of past ways you’ve taught me to be comfortable and safe on my journey and show me even more ways to live with intention and gratitude at this stage in my life. I am so forgetful."
Thanks to Rebecca at Recuerda mi Corazon for hosting all of us at Haiku my Heart Friday. This image came from Google images an was attributed to Buddy the Buddha of Missississipi, but when I asked for permission to use it, he said the universe provided it and to feel free to display it publicly.
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